Originally Published in Worship Leader Magazine Vol 28 No 3
By Kevin Cloud
In the fall of 2018, for one week, I must have said the same words fifteen times: “Our leadership team has decided to close the doors of our church.”
Each time I spoke these words, I felt numb. The conversations got no easier. Closing our church was the right decision for many reasons, and yet I had never imagined taking such a step. I had no idea how to lead myself through the painful process, let alone lead the others who had depended on me.
I felt deep sadness and anger—anger towards myself, anger towards members of our team who had let me down, and anger towards God for calling me to plant this church only to have it fail. I felt disappointed in myself and my failures as a leader. Embarrassed, I found myself drowning in self-doubt.