Episode | October 3, 2022

Transcript for Lydia Ingegneri’s Episode of The Walk

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Joshua Swanson: Welcome to The Walk; a devotionals podcast led by worship leaders. In this episode, Lydia Ingegneri tells us about her son, who was called to be a leader of leaders at a very early age. Here we go.

Lydia Ingegneri: It’s really great to be here today and, uh, just to be part of what God is doing through Worship Leader. Um, I am honored to be able to share part of my story, which includes my eldest son Dominic. I am a mother of four amazing, awesome kids. Um, Dominic is 16, James is 14, and I have twin daughters, Kelly and Mia, who are 11.

And being their mother is the greatest gift I have ever been given. They, uh, keep me on my toes. They have pointed me to Jesus and kept me on my knees and really bring me, um, an immense amount of joy in this life.

Today I’m gonna be sharing a little bit about my eldest son Dominic, because very, very early on in his life, we discovered with him a very unique type of leadership gift that was wrapped up in his creative expression. Um, when I was pregnant with Dominic, um, he moved around a tremendous amount and uh, I know I’m probably not the only mom who’s ever experienced that, but in the womb, he was extremely active.

And I remember telling my husband, Scott, I don’t think this child ever sleeps. Like, I don’t think he rests. I think he’s just going constantly. And I remember praying over him one day and just laying my hands on my stomach and just praying over him and I prayed a couple of things. I prayed, Lord, fill this child with the Holy Spirit, um, because I believe that children in the womb are probably the closest to the Lord that they will ever be in that environment.

And I prayed that he would be filled with the Holy Spirit. And then I just asked the Lord to speak to me about him, which I’ve done with all of my kids, but Dominic was my first. So, I asked very specifically, Lord, talk to me about about this child and I very distinctly heard the Lord say he is a leader of leaders.

And he was definitely right about that. And from the moment that Dominic was born, he displayed a very active mind and a very active body. Um, what I mean by that is within two hours of being born, he was literally holding his head up on his own and looking around the room. He was the baby who never wanted to take a nap.

He was the toddler that was always running around and needing to be active. And, um, when he was about four or five years old, we started to discover that he had kind of a hard time staying focused unless it was something that had to do with lights and media, and of course as a parent you are trying to avoid exposing your toddlers to lights and media and overstimulation because you don’t want them to get addicted to those things.

But we were serving as lead pastors of a church at that time and so we would bring him to the church with us and all he wanted to do was touch the sound board and the lighting board and um, mess with things and, you know, we let him do it. We are those parents that let him touch the things that kids are probably not supposed to touch.

Of course, he was under our supervision, but we began to see how interested he was with these technical things. Then he started his school journey and that was tricky because we very quickly also with him, began to see that he did not fit in the traditional school box. He would make a lot of noise. He would tap his fingers, he would be disruptive, and it’s not because I think he tried to be, it’s just because his creative brain was constantly going. 

And so it ended up not being a very positive experience for him, uh, being in the traditional school system. So we decided in his fourth grade year to pull him out and begin homeschooling him, which was probably the best move we could have ever made because it allowed us to give him the time to, um, discover this creative, um, drive and to be able to really focus on that. 

And what we would do is we would bring him to the church and let him play with the lighting board. We would show him videos about lighting and about technical things and we discovered that within minutes he would learn what to do. Within minutes he would understand, um, how this huge technical thing would function. 

And this just kept going on all throughout his, um, his elementary years. And then when he was 11 years old, um, the Lord spoke to us about relocating our family to Nashville. And we as a family moved, um, to the state of Tennessee and to Nashville, and we began to travel, uh, almost full time as itinerant ministers. And we would bring our kids on the road with us as often as we possibly could. Um, but Dominic would come almost on every trip and he would either do videography for us or, uh, photography or lighting or PowerPoint. And we just recognized, wow, he’s doing a great job and he’s not being overly flashy or distracting.

He has this ability to be able to sense the room and to sense what the Holy Spirit is doing and facilitate through lighting in the visual, just an atmosphere and a presence, um, for the Lord to move and, um, you know, one of the things that was also going on at this time was behaviorally, it was a little bit of a challenge with him because he wasn’t able to express yet with words how he was feeling because it was so much, and the best way for him to be able to do that was in a creative setting. So we just decided that we were gonna give him every opportunity that we could to do that because there was a lot of anger outbursts, there was a lot of disruptive behavior, and we realized it was because he didn’t have the right kind of an outlet to use these gifts.

And me being a passionate Norwegian woman, I would get very angry and I would get very overwhelmed. And I remember the Holy Spirit saying, “come in the opposite spirit. Don’t, don’t quench this fire that is within him. Train him and discipline him in love and help bring him down to a place where he sees that you are for him and that you are not a against him, because a lot of adults have a hard time understanding and receiving the gifts of kids, because it’s scary to relinquish control to kids, right? 

You don’t want kids to ruin things or to mess things up, or to not take responsibility and to treat things with respect and with care. And so we kind of heard from God that you need to show him trust with adults at a very early age because he is gonna be working with adults as a child. Like there’s not gonna be a season in his little life here where he is not gonna be working with adults and he needs to learn submission to adults so that he can receive from them. And he also needs to learn how to communicate properly with adults so that he can have a healthy mentorship and working relationship 

At the age of 13 he became the video director, um, for a church that we were currently working with here in Tennessee. It was during the pandemic, it was during lockdown, and he kind of got thrown into this environment of very quickly being able to use his gifts and he rose to the occasion and he was working directly under me and my husband.

Um, so he had that safety, but he was also working with a pretty large production team at that time. A sound engineer, a lighting person, a video operator, an entire video team that he was, um, in charge of really helping direct and we began to see, oh my gosh, he’s doing it. He’s 13 years old and he is leading, he is engaging. He’s doing all these things that we’ve been trying to cultivate and trying to nourish, and, um, he’s learning how to deal with difficult personalities. He’s learning how to deal with offense when adults say mean things, which sometimes happens. And he’s learning how to navigate his own heart and um, to be a trustworthy young man.

And so we have done this with all of our kids too, but, but Dominic was the first who just really kind of launched us into this journey of how do you steward a very creative child who is called to serve the church and to serve in ministry.

Joshua Swanson: In the second half of this episode, Lydia focuses on the biblical call that we have to develop and mentor the next generation. 

Some of you may have already heard that we are launching an online institute called the Worship Leader Institute, and it has all kinds of amazing training and workshops, but we also offer coaching and mentorship from some of the most experienced worship leaders out there.

Joe Horness, formerly of Willow Creek, is head of our coaching program and he said that his goal is that every worship leader is able to lead their congregation into an encounter with a living God. 

Amber Bricker is one of our mentees, and here she is talking about her experience.

Lydia Ingegneri: So the worship leader position at my church, it really just sort of fell into my lap and I had no idea what I was doing. I had a lot of feelings of inadequacy and I struggled really hard at first. I was just scrolling online one day looking for resources and I randomly stumbled across the mentorship program and I just thought to myself, this is something I really need.

So I got started right away. The mentor that I was connected with was really down to earth. He was really funny. We just really connected. We clicked right away and he’s taught me a lot about communication, about dealing with conflict. And I’ve also learned some things, um, not just with the one on one coaching, but through the mentor coffee chats and the monthly workshops that they do. I, I’ve learned about stage setup and lighting. Stuff you don’t always think about, so that was cool. 

I just think that the mentorship program is priceless. It’s priceless. Uh, the wisdom and the knowledge that the mentors provide is, it’s amazing. They’re, they’re skilled and they’re godly and that speaks a lot to my heart. I, I am thankful. I’m thankful to the mentorship program and I’m thankful to God because I would not have gained the confidence that I have as a leader now. I, I feel capable. Idid not feel capable before, but I wouldn’t have been the leader that I am now without their help. 

Joshua Swanson: We highly encourage you to head over to the Worship Leader Institute and inquire about this transformative coaching. The links in the show notes, but it’s www.worshipleaderinstitute.com. Okay, back to Lydia.

Lydia Ingegneri: So this experience with my son has really opened my eyes and, um, taught me a lot about this “now” generation that’s rising up, this Gen Z that is oozing with gifting and talent and, um, a passion to use their creative gifts and what is available now wasn’t available even when I was younger. And I think that there’s a responsibility on us who are raising kids in the ministry and for those who are leading, um, this, this next generation to just recognize that there are a lot of frustrated creatives.

And one of the things that began to manifest itself in my son was this frustration that was anger. And if you have a younger person in your sphere of influence that maybe is acting out or not able to express this desire, I would say that it could be that they’re just inwardly frustrated because they need a place to be able to release this gifting, to be able to identify, um, the specific what I like to just call it what it is, it’s an anointing that I believe rests on this generation to; they are the next generation that’s gonna lead the church through these next 25, 30, 40, 50 years like we have to be. Like, we have to be able and willing to give them a place. 

What it has taught me is, you know, I’m just a middle aged, you know, mom and minister who still has tons of years left, I believe of leading and imparting, but I’m already now turning around and looking behind me going, who is rising up behind me that needs to take my place, that needs to engage and be taught and be, and be given, um, opportunity to like learn what biblical stewardship looks like, to learn what response, and if we’re not doing this in the church, you guys were basically just handing them to the world and saying, “have your way with them.”

So given how important it is for us to receive and release this next generation, I think it’s also equally important that they understand their identity and that they have a place. And for me, one of my key scriptures has been from Psalm 139, which talks about how he made all the inner parts of our body. He knit us together in our mother’s womb. That we are perfectly created in his image. 

And then Ephesians 2:10 says “that we are his masterpiece and that there are works that he has prepared for us in advance,” like before we were even born, that we should walk in. And then Psalm 145 says, that one generation to the next is gonna praise him, is gonna declare his works and tell of his marvelous deeds.

And so this is so pivotal, is that we are looking to this next generation, we are receiving, we are giving them opportunity, we are mentoring, we are putting faith in and not being afraid to let them be who they are, but giving them these principles and giving them these truths. 

So in love, I wanna challenge every listener to open up your eyes to see this young generation around you and to begin giving them opportunity. Because the truth is, is if we don’t, we’re gonna lose them. And statistics are true and proven that when kids hit the age of 18, even if they were raised up in the church, they’re not staying in the church, because they don’t feel that sense of ownership. They don’t feel value or like they’re even needed within the church, because they’re being told, yeah, you have to be an adult in order to serve in the church, or you have to be this or that, or you have to be up on that platform in order to serve in the church. And it’s just, not, it’s just not true. 

So I think we have an opportunity to capture and to nurture and to release a powerful generation of anointed leaders if we’ll just be courageous enough to open up our eyes and to do it. 

So in closing, um, through some tears, I, I really just wanna thank my son Dominic, who has been and continues to be an absolute delight to Mother, to lead, and now to partner alongside in the work of the ministry. I just wanna honor him for his sacrifice as well, and for, for doing the hard thing and for just being obedient to the call of God on his life. I know God is gonna honor and take him further than he could ever dream to go, and I want him to know that I’m his biggest cheerleader.

Joshua Swanson: What an incredible example of training and equipping the next generation. Thank you again, Lydia, for sharing your heart with us. We actually just published another episode of The Walk with songwriter and artist Matt Maher, and he has a similar story surrounding the importance of mentorship. Make sure you check out that episode as well, but it’s always amazing to me how the Holy Spirit puts the same stirrings in the hearts of people from all different parts of the world.

When that happens and we see a movement happening surrounding a topic like building up the next generation of leaders, it means it’s probably worth it for us to pay attention. 

As always, special thanks to Matt McCartie for producing and editing today’s episode, Jacob Fairclough produced our theme song. The Walk is brought to you by Worship Leader Magazine, which is an Authentic Media brand. I’m Joshua Swanson. We’re going to play out today’s episode with one of Lydia’s songs. It’s called Tell It Again.